How to impress her even in a recession

Is the current economic climate having any effect on dating?  There are conflicting reports stating both cases – the healthy state of the dating industry – be that online dating, matchmakers and the like vs. the opposite – a downturn in some numbers on the paid dating sites and a reduction in some dating activities.  Most people could view dating as a discretionary expense;   however, many people see this as a key area of their life, particularly in a gloomy economic climate where fun and excitement can be found on the dating scene or love and support in a new and ongoing relationship.  Consequently, they are willing to continue spending money on dating and finding someone.

Can you still impress her if you’re between jobs or watching the pennies?
The economic downturn has brought job losses and the predictions are that these will continue to occur over the next year.  There are losses across the board in all levels and in many industries. But, this won’t be forever.  The most important thing you need to do if you are in this situation is to remember this is temporary and address your mindset so it remains positive and optimistic.  I think it is important to be truthful and state clearly where you are at with any date.  An idea is to say that previously you were employed as an x, however now you are out of work but are doing y and z to help you either get employment or improve your chances.  Don’t be afraid to say you need to watch your pennies at the moment whilst you ride this storm.  Believe it or not your clear statements as to where you are at, what your plans are to overcome where you are at and your cost cut measures can be seen as attractive qualities by women.  You are perceived as honest, decisive, a problem solver and someone who has financial management skills.

A few ideas of what and where to go
There are so many things you can do for nothing or next to nothing, some of which are on the resources section of the www.datingadvice.co.nz website, however, some examples include:-

• Plan an inexpensive picnic, with either each of you (or just you) bringing something along and enjoy it in a nice location such as by a beach, river or in the park
• The museum or art gallery in the city or town closest to you
• Go wine tasting together
• Check out your local Farmer’s markets and enjoy together
• Take a walk in the bush, go cycling or similar outdoors activity
• Take a scenic drive
• Check out any free events in your area such as music, poetry readings or similar 

The fact that you have been creative, thought of some options, planned ahead and organised a date and maybe even made it a surprise can be very endearing.  You cared enough and were resourceful enough to make it happen.

What if she earns more than you?

So your date is earning more than you?  Maybe that’s just temporary while you are finding a job or maybe she always will.  Most guys kind of like the idea of a woman who has great earning potential but many do struggle with the idea of losing that role of being the main breadwinner and impressing a woman with status, money, power, whatever it might be.  Whether it’s temporary or permanent you both have to get your head around this one otherwise it will eat you up.  Work on your self esteem, do the best you can to get a job or do the best you can to do well in your job and also look at what you can do to even out the exchange.  It might be that you help her with tasks around the house or that your stunning personality is enough to win her over!  Above all, be open and honest and if you can, declare that you would like to be offering more on the financial side than you currently are.  The mere fact that you acknowledge the difference can assist greatly. 

Can you be too extravagant?

Okay so you are sitting pretty and money isn’t a problem for you at the moment and you do want to impress her still, what to do?  If you’ve lavished her with extravagance in the past and it has worked for you, you might continue to do so.   However, you do have to be careful, especially early on in dating.  The one thing you want to avoid is looking too desperate.   Throwing around your money can make you look like this is all you have to offer.   Also be aware that she may feel uncomfortable, feel that she isn’t at your level, inadequate and feel she is unable to reciprocate.  Tread carefully and with respect.

We are all aware of the belt-tightening around us.  Being open and honest, thoughtful, creative, resourceful and optimistic will do much to impress her even in these trying times.

Denise Corlett, founder of Dating Advice, is an expert in helping professional men and women find, attract and be successful in relationships.  Click for more dating advice information on how to get partnered